Of love and grief
by TrailOfTheBlueFlame
Summary: After Ninian's death, Eliwood spirals into a pit of despair and grief. Rated for language and slight blood and gore.


My first fanfic, I hope you enjoy, I try.

The heir to Pherae watched in horror as the slain dragon in front of him gradually shrunk, and took the shape of a slim feminine figure.

"N-No, N-Ninian?"

As he kneeled down to look at the lavender haired girl, his worst fears were confirmed. Grief flowed through him as he looked upon the face of the dragon-girl he had slain. He felt light-headed, and when he tried to step forward, he stumbled and the ground rushed up to meet him.

_In his mind's eye, he was back when him and his army were fighting Jerme, a crazed, bloodthirsty assassin. Ninian was dancing for Hector, reenergizing him as he took on a paladin. The paladin attempted a strike at Hector's unprotected head. He ducked and swung the Wolf Beil, making a huge dent in his armor. As the paladin fell forward, Rebecca shot an arrow in between the armor plates at his neck. The enemy dispatched, Hector and Rebecca carried on to engage more foes. Eliwood called out to Ninian, _

"_Ninian."_

_"…Lord Eliwood."_

_He closed the distance between them, " I finally caught up with you."_

_He continued, speaking in a worried voice, "What's wrong, Ninian? Why the long face?"_

_"Please, do not worry on my account. I… I am not worthy— I am not even worthy to stand in your sight, Lord Eliwood. I have been deceiving you." She stammered, evidently upset._

_"Yes, as you were saying before. Ninian… You have been keeping some secret from us?" He asked, concern glittering in his azure eyes._

_"Yes." _

_"But… you can't tell me what it is. Am I right?" He confirmed._

_"…Yes." She responded, her facing reflecting dismay._

_"Very well."_

_"What…?" She replied, dumbfounded._

_"If it is too hard for you to talk about, I will not force you. Just… if you ever feel able, tell me then." He responded, kindness and love alight in his face._

_"But… I have been false… I have lied to you and the others." She answered, not feeling worthy of his forgiveness._

_"Ninian, I love you. That will not change, no matter what may come."_

_"Lord Eliwood…"_

_"I don't care what your secret is—I will still fell the same. If something troubles you, let me sweep it away. Please don't cry anymore. I would do anything to see you smile again. You are the first woman I have ever felt this way about, Ninian." He stated, desire to help the lovely women in front of him laden in his voice._

_"Lord Eliwood…I…I don't know what—Lord Eliwood…Lord Eliwood…" She wept, grateful for his understanding."_

He woke up in a cold sweat, in an unknown chamber. Realization that he would never see Ninian again filled him, along with guilt at killing her, and grief over her loss. He wept for what seemed like an eternity, and as he cried a new emotion entered him mind, anger. Anger at Nergal, who had killed Ninian. Anger at himself, for not protecting her. The fury inside his mind grew until it dwarfed all other emotions, even rational thought. All that remained was anger, and determination to kill the bastards that had stolen her from him.

Suddenly, he was aware of sounds around him. Sounds of swords clashing, sounds of combat. This was his chance for revenge! He leapt off his bed and staggered forward, still weak from his fainting spell. He noticed his weapons leaning against a blue stonewall. He reached for Durandal, however as he touched its rounded hilt, grief surged through him, and he pulled his hand back and grabbed his nearby silver sword.

He unlatched the wooden door and ran into the hallway, running as fast as he could in his weakened state. He headed towards the sounds of combat, distinctly hearing Pent chant his deadly Elfire spell. He emerged into a large domed room; a quick glance of his surroundings told him that he was in Castle Ostia. The battle was almost over, the few remaining opponents gathered around a sniper, who was obviously the enemy commander. Wil was exchanging arrows with the commander, while Raven, Hector, Dart and Oswin protected him.

Eliwood had no time to further observe his surroundings, a swordmaster was charging him, killing edge prepared to stab deep into his vitals. Eliwood sprung out of the way, preventing his instant death, but still leaving him with a large gash down his arm. The anger from before returned, elevated by the searing pain in his arm. He got up and swung his sword muscularly. It struck metal with a resounding clang. The two swords locked, and the combatants began a battle of strength. The muscles on the foes arms bulged, and normally Eliwood would have been overpowered quickly, however filled with anger and bloodlust, he managed to shove the swordmaster back. Seizing the moment, Eliwood struck down with his sword and the swordmaster fell back onto the wall, knocking him out.

Hunger for blood and revenge, Eliwood thrust his blade into his felled foes chest. Blood, crimson as his hair, came out. Yelling loudly, he swung his weapon repeatedly at his opponent's body. Worn out, he stopped and leaned against a wall feeling

"Eliwood! Are you crazy! What in blazes are you doing fighting," Hector ran up to him, the battle won.

"He won." Grunted Raven.

"Still!"

Eliwood looked at his bloody blade, and then at the mutilated corpse of his enemy. His desire for revenge was not quenched; in fact it had gotten stronger. He tried to get up but failed and fell onto the cold marble floor.

"Eliwood!!" Hector yelled.

"He's not responding, we should carry him to the healer's chamber." Raven stated, bending down.

Eliwood went quickly in between consciousness and unconsciousness, catching brief snatches of faces. A burly man with blue hair, a shy looking girl with a feather tucked in her hair and a slight, pink haired girl, her mouth-moving non-stop. He felt a warm feeling go through him, and all went black for a long time.

He spent the next few days recovering, having to lie down in on whatever his bed was, as his army gradually moved closer to the dragon's gate. Left in solitude whenever there was fight, he retreated into himself, and he gradually started going insane. A week later, when they finally arrived at their destination, he was strong enough to fight again physically, but mentally he was a wreck. Theo, the tactician, insisted that Eliwood not fight, however, Eliwood was desperate for revenge and his orders trumped.

On the battlefield however, Theo's orders were law, and Eliwood was ordered to stay out of the battle, only acting as back up. He saw in the distance Athos strike down Nergal, and felt disappointment that he could not of delivered the slaying blow. Events happened in a blur, Nergal opened the gate; the dragons came forward, Athos defended the group and then suddenly Bramimond appeared. He ordered all of them to step forward and in a blinding flash, Ninian appeared. He felt a sensation of pure joy, however it was suddenly replaced by anger. _How dare she put him through this, all this suffering. All this could have been avoided if she had trusted him, told him her secret. If she had trusted him… but she hadn't! _His brooding was interrupted as a sheet of ice and snow emerged from Ninian, coaxing a blood curdling scream from the fire dragons. Ninian collapsed along side with two of the three dragons.

Theo's orders rang loud and clear, " Eliwood, Hector, attack the dragon! Athos, Pent, support them with physic staves. Rath, protect Nils!"

Eliwood charged forward on his war horse, and struck with twice Durandal, long before Hector even arrived. The dragon ignored the blows as they were merely wasp bites, and blew life-consuming fire at the red-haired lord. The instant the inferno struck, Pent cast a physic spell. It was an odd feeling, his entire body being singed one instant and the next as smooth as a babe's skin. As the fire consumed Eliwood, Hector struck twice with the mighty thunder axe, Armads, the forceful blows crushing the scales in the dragon's head. The dragon, weakening, opened his mouth to breath more fire at Eliwood. Seizing the moment, his anger returning, the Pherean lord stabbed his sword into the dragon's gaping jaw. As he struck, for a split second he imagined Ninian in the place of the fire dragon, and then it was over. The dragon fell forward dead. Eliwood watched as Ninian walked slowly towards him. He restrained his anger, his anger at her lack of trust in him, her betrayal.

"L-Lord Eliwood?'

He snapped. His arm flew forward, striking her cheek.

"Bitch."

Her eyes opened wide, a red hand mark appearing on her face. Tears glistened in her eyes and she turned around and ran through the dragon's gate.

"Ninian wait!" Nils yelled, running after her.

Exhausted mentally and physically, his wounds not fully healed, Eliwood slumped against the wall and closed his eyes.

Over the next few weeks, Eliwood was gradually nursed back to health in Castle Pherae. After five weeks, rational thought gradually returned to his mind.

He woke up one morning, sunlight streaming through the shut curtains. Realization of what had transpired struck him like a brick wall, and he fell to the cold stone floor, weeping for his lost love.

I hope you enjoyed. Reviews would be much appreciated.


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